GOALS | 23 March 2016

What if you don’t know what you want?

I’ve been reading a lot about goal setting and happiness, and while reading those books it all sounds so easy. After finishing a book you get the feeling you’ve figured out life. Hah, think again! These last two months I’ve felt somewhat lost. Don’t get me wrong: I absolutely love to be a full time entrepreneur, but my end goal is somewhat fuzzy. When I started blogging I needed a creative outlet, something that was my own. I had a clear vision of the kind of blogposts I’d be writing. I never expected in a million years so many of you would be looking at my pictures and reading what I wrote (Thank you, thank you, thank you!). For two years I was working steadily to develop my own style and view on fashion and interior design, while working on my other business as well. And yes, it’s great when you finally get the sense you’ve found your way, but I expected that feeling of completion would last and last.

Last month I read Creativity, Inc. by Ed Catmull. Which essentially is a book about how to run a creative business but is so much more than that. Ed shares the process of making Toy Story, his life goal. “I had spent twenty years inventing new technological tools, helping found Pixar, and working hard to make all the facets of this company communicate and work well together. All of this had been in the service of a single goal: making a computer-animated feature film. We had succeeded by holding true to our ideals; nothing could be better than that. But while I could feel that euphoria, I was oddly unable to participate in it. For twenty years, my life had been defined by the goal of making the first computer graphics movie. Now that that goal had been reached, I had what I can only describe as a hollow, lost feeling. Now what?” I wouldn’t dare to compare my blog and company to Pixar (I can only dream of accomplishing something that big, halleluja…), but when I read his story I knew why I felt off lately. I had reached my goal.

When you work towards a goal, your view of the future is one where unicorns shit rainbows. It’s hard to look past the first pink colored weeks where you skip through life, energized by everything you’ve accomplished. But after a month or so, there will come a time where you will start to feel lost. Now what? What I’ve learned this last year is that it’s not the end result that counts but the journey of getting there. The journey is everything! It’s working towards a goal that gets me going, that makes me forget to eat and sleep. And I need a clear goal again. But until I figure that one out, I’ll happily talk to you guys about all this right here on the blog cause I’m sure I’m not the only one. Let’s do this!